The voices go on and on, but as I was taking a shower, I realized that I think I’m getting used to never seeing you again.
Because twice now you’ve told me you want nothing to do with me, or in one example you said you’d spread racism, and despite my hallucinations and delusions, I need to accept that that’s who you are, someone far separated from the woman I love.
Every once in a while the voices come back, and that makes me want to hold on to this blog, but choosing not to regurgitate the hateful, despicable things that tell me began a process of me almost being able to digest the voices and hear them and let them pass, sans having to express myself here, which makes me think once again that I can delete this blog.
We’ll see I suppose.
I mean I wish things were different but I do honestly have to start looking for someone that loves me back.