I know I’ve gone over this before, if that before was when I was more insane than I am now, but the voices are saying that guy you “kissed at the door” in the DR was either a lie or a half truth, because they now claim you actually had sex with them.
But I recall what I said on my side of the planet:
“There’s nothing I could do.”
And, yeah while I may have been, I think, “disappointed” that it all happened, a kiss or otherwise, like I’ve also been saying recently, we were both young, dumb, and full of cum.
And I can’t go back in time to change the past and if I could I don’t think I’d want to.
What I want is for you to have eyes and hands and teeth and tongue for me and me only, and if that’s unrealistic or a hard lesson for you to adhere to then whatever, I’m not trying to sit here and “regret” ever interacting with you because we did meet ourselves, you and I, and you brought me so much fucking JOY.
I know I haven’t talked about that given, all of this, but that’s the one thing that maybe keeps me in love with you:
I was so fucking happy and you really have no idea.
Or maybe you do, because I’ve been talking around that point of my life for the last 15+ years.
Fuck whomever you want, do whatever you want, live however you want.
It’s not like you’re coming home to me.