If you stayed

I wouldn’t have lived out my terrible 20’s the way I did.

I’m certain it would have been much different.

But you weren’t around

you weren’t here

I did what I had to

and I can’t change the past.

Dark Thoughts

Suicide after xanga break up

father fuck

“perfect size”

never wanted to get erect again

something something something stop fucking telling me this shit

you never wanted me to know this

YOU, FIRST

Voices say I don’t have what it takes to get back together with you because you’re suicidal.

I’m not trying to stop you from doing anything that you want to do.

I have my life in the palm of my hands ask I’m sure you have yours.

I hope you understand the meaning in that last sentence.

Norwegians would be Extinct

If there were more black people like me, the voices say.

But from everything the voices have been saying, it sounds like Norwegians were a blight on the earth anyway, so good riddance.

Facebook, again

Voices say you went to bed with all of your friends on Facebook, that’s why you deleted it

Edit:

Voices say you’re having sex right now as I type

My mom?

Voices say you would’ve tried to have sex with my mom if I let you sleep at my place so long ago

edit:

I just texted my mom, not about this, but I told her if things keep getting out of control in my noggin I’m gonna check myself into a hospital. Hopefully I won’t have to do that.

Power man

Voices say in your head superheroes from Marvel or DC Comics talk to you whereas I have voices I recognize one from real life

Bipolar Disorder

Poop’n out cures.

You would just “give people what they wanted” but it sounds vaguely sexual, like what if someone wanted a bottlE of vodka, would you just buy it for them?

They say I’m the only one that wants it now.

Killed your dad

Voices say that, and it was premeditated and that’s what you have wanted more than being with me.

If any of what I’ve been typing is true, I don’t blame you.